these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize