I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Randomize