Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
a search helicopter?!
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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