My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Randomize