omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
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Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
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I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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