why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Dick very happy bro
Randomize
