Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
wanna go halves on a baby?
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
