Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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