gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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