Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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