he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
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