hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize
