Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
