i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Randomize
