You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
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he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
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I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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