I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
