Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
