think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
