i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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