Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
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