mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize