420 ftw
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize