oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize