Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
