We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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