Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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