party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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