Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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