So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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