Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
My penis needs a shock collar
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
