I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
