I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.