Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Randomize