"it" just moved
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
