I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize