I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize