I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
She announced her abortion via fbk
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
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