Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
