If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
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