As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
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