I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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