Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Randomize