Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
