Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
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