so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
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