"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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