the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
