So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
