really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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