I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
