doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Randomize
