Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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